Starring Scout Taylor-Compton, Malcolm McDowell, and Sheri Moon Zombie
Directed by Rob Zombie
I've never seen a Halloween movie in my life, so all I knew going into this was this guy named Michael Myers goes around killing people. Well, that's pretty much the whole movie. Why does he do this? Who knows...I guess there's something psychologically disturbed about him -- he sees visions of his dead mom and his childhood self wherever he goes, taunting him to kill people. Nevertheless, it's still just a slasher flick with a killer who is super strong, somewhat indestructible, and walks incredibly slow, but still manages to catch up with all the idiots he wishes to kill (no need to waste energy running...need to save your strength for the impaling and stabbing).
There's nothing here worth recommending. The lead actress (Scout Taylor-Compton) is awful. The kills are the same thing over and over again (he just stabs people). Nothing here that you haven't seen before. There are some okay directorial shots, but most of the time Zombie's "weird" shots just scream "pretentious" and "ego-trip."
I will say that I thought it was moderately cool that Zombie set a series of murders to the Moody Blues song "Nights in White Satin." It's not often I get to hear Moody Blues songs outside of my car via my plugged-in iPod. Still, while it made me happy, you don't get any extra points for that, Mr. Zombie.
The RyMickey Rating: D-