The Nutcracker and the Four Realms

The Nutcracker and the Four Realms (2018)

Starring Mackenzie Foy, Keira Knightley, Eugenio Derbez, Matthew Macfadyen, Richard E. Grant, Misty Copeland, Helen Mirren, and Morgan Freeman

Directed by Lasse Hallström and Joe Johnston

Written by Ashleigh Powell

Click here for my Letterboxd review

The RyMickey Rating:  C-

Movie Review - 5 Flights Up

5 Flights Up (2015)

Starring Morgan Freeman, Diane Keaton, and Cynthia Nixon

Directed by Richard Loncraine

***This film is currently available on HBO Now***

I've always liked Morgan Freeman and Diane Keaton (despite the fact that the latter has played nothing but interchangeable characters in the last twenty years) so I figured why not give 5 Flights Up a shot.  Sure, it's a little comedy that made not a blip on anyone's cinematic radar last year, but the two leads are always watchable, so I gave it a go.

Well, it's a big ole bust.  Freeman and Keaton are charming as Alex and Ruth Carver, an older married couple who, after forty years of marriage, decide it may be time to move out of their fifth floor NYC apartment for the simple reason that they may be getting too weak to climb up the stairs.  Once you move past that charming aspect, though, everything else falters.  Burdened with stories of a dog with a slipped disc, a possible Muslim terrorist running rampant through their neighborhood (despite the obviousness from the get go that this isn't really the case), and Ruth's talkative niece/real estate agent (Cynthia Nixon), 5 Flights Up lacks any modicum of focus.  The two leads can't save the lack of a cohesive story and this whole thing falls terribly flat.

The RyMickey Rating:  D+

Movie Review - Lucy

Lucy (2014)

Starring Scarlett Johansson, Morgan Freeman, Min-Sik Choi, Analeigh Tipton, and Amr Waked

Directed by Luc Besson

My biggest problem with director-screenwriter Luc Besson's Lucy is that I found it difficult to suspend belief and imagine a reality in which there was some feasibility with the title character's superheroic abilities she gains after being given a drug that strengthens her mental capabilities to fully utilize all 100% of her brain's power.  I realize there's a slight whiff of hypocrisy when I can watch something like Jurassic Park and believe that dinosaurs roam the Earth again or a film like Skyfall and buy into the notion that James Bond can run atop a speeding train.  However, something about Lucy didn't ring true and because of that, I found myself removed from the proceedings.

Scarlett Johansson is the title character -- a gal who just happens to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and finds her life completely turned upside down.  In Taiwan, she finds that her boyfriend (or perhaps one-night-stand partner) forces her to deliver a package to an evil drug kingpin (Min-Sik Choi) who in turn implants a package of a newfangled drug in Lucy's stomach forcing her to become a drug mule and carry the supply back to America with her.  However, on her way back home, Lucy is abducted, beaten up quite badly, and, after a powerful kick to her abdomen, finds that the package of drugs is leaking into her body.

As Lucy's story unfolds, we have interspersed scenes of Morgan Freeman as Professor Samuel Norman giving a lecture on how human beings only use 7% of their brain capacity.  Were we to utilize even 20%, we'd see marked differences in how we interact with others.  Thanks to this experimental drug, Lucy is finding out just what a 20% utilization will do and as the drugs seep further into her system, she finds that she is able to do things no human could imagine.

I could deal with Lucy reading lips and becoming quite adept at punching people, but when she starts being able to manipulate matter (both inhuman and human), I admit that I threw in the towel.  Johansson is fine here -- I think she's actually a decent "action" star -- but as Lucy's brain capacity increases, her emotions become nonexistent.  Her character's sassy (and, quite frankly, humorously enjoyable) demeanor at the film's outset becomes a blank slate by the film's end and it just makes for a bland ride.

Lucy is by no means a bad film -- its quick running time of under ninety minutes certainly speeds things along -- but I just couldn't accept the concept perhaps because it was a little too much in human "reality."

The RyMickey Rating:  C

Movie Review - The Lego Movie

The Lego Movie (2014)

Featuring the voice talents of Chris Pratt, Will Ferrell, Elizabeth Banks, Will Arnett, Charlie Day, Alison Brie, Nick Offerman, Liam Neeson, and Morgan Freeman

Directed by Phil Lord and Christopher Miller

So much hype may have ruined The Lego Movie for me seeing as it was greeted with glowing reviews and much love from the public upon its release in February.  To me, directors Phil Lord and Christopher Miller -- who brought us the fantastic Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs (and the great 21 Jump Street as well) -- are repeating their same old shtick here with less success.  Perhaps their charm has worn thin as I found much of The Lego Movie's jokes to fall flat and the overall plot to be a bit boring and bland.

The Lego Movie follows Emmet Brickowski (voiced by Chris Pratt), a Lego construction worker who does everything by the book -- he follows directions and instructions to a T.  One evening on the construction site after everyone else has gone home, Emmet falls down a hole and finds, unbeknown to him, the much fabled (in the Lego world in which he lives) "Piece of Resistance" and, after touching it and seeing prophetic visions, Emmet is knocked out.  He awakens captured by Lord Business (Will Ferrell) -- the "mayor" of this aspect of the Lego universe who, Emmet discovers, is out to eliminate free-thinking and imagination.  Emmet is rescued from Business's clutches by Wyldstyle (Elizabeth Banks) and taken through a portal to a whole slew of Lego lands in an attempt to hide Emmet and the "Piece of Resistance" from Lord Business.  Emmet discovers on this journey that Lego lore states that whomever uncovers the "Piece of Resistance" is the Master Builder and will bring security to all of the Lego worlds which places unimaginative Emmet in a bit of a pickle since he has never been a free thinker...but now the Lego people must put their trust in him in order to defeat Lord Business.

The Lego Movie works best when the film takes on a variety of pop culture references and brings them to the forefront.  Seeing Lego Batman (voiced brilliantly by Will Arnett) and a variety of other well-known entities interact with Emmet is the most successful aspect of the flick.  Unfortunately, when The Lego Movie focuses on Emmet -- as it does most of the first half of the film -- the jokes don't land with as much resonance and get tired and worn quicker than they should.  Admittedly, my second viewing of director Lord and Miller's Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs didn't hold up, so maybe I've tired of their weird humor, but I'd like to think this impressive team has more to offer in the future.  Unfortunately, The Lego Movie bored me and that's sometimes the worst criticism one can offer.

The RyMickey Rating:  C

Movie Review - Transcendence

Transcendence (2014)

Starring Johnny Depp, Rebecca Hall, Paul Bettany, Cillian Murphy, Kate Mara, Clifton Collins Jr., and Morgan Freeman

Directed by Wally Pfister

Conceptually, Transcendence is probably one of the more interesting films I've seen as of late.  Will Caster (Johnny Depp) is the mastermind behind a sentient computer which he hopes will outpace the human race in terms of intelligence.  While Caster and his wife Evelyn (Rebecca Hall) see potential in such technology, there are large swaths of people who fear such work will bring an end to humankind.  One such group -- R.I.F.T., or "Revolutionary Independence From Technology" -- goes to terroristic means in order to get their point across, and after a conference in which Will Caster touts his opinions, Will is shot by a RIFT member who then kills himself.  After a few days, it's discovered the bullet shot into Will was laced with plutonium, thus causing Will's bloodstream to be contaminated with radiation leaving him with less than a month to live.  Desperate for Will's dream about sentient technology not to die with him, Evelyn thinks up the idea to place Will's entire consciousness inside the computer he's developing so that his "spirit" will never die and his intelligence can continue making technological advances.  Unfortunately, things go a bit awry with this plan, creating a bit of havoc and a battle between man and machine.

I don't know about you, but I kind of dig that Terminator-esque Man v. Computer battle being set up. Unfortunately, first-time director Wally Pfister languidly paces the film so that we can't help but be bored by what we're seeing unfold.  It certainly doesn't help matters that Johnny Depp doesn't even appear to be awake -- if he can't be bothered being interested in what he's doing, how in the world are we going to care?  After a promising start, the flick written by first-time screenwriter Jack Paglen begins to unravel and its climactic moments fail to resonate despite the captivating premise.

It's possible that in more experienced hands Transcendence may have been a success, but as it stands now with first timers behind both the lens and the scripting with neither behind-the-scenes aspect able to convince the film's leading actor to appear alive onscreen, the flick falls flat.

The RyMickey Rating:  C-

Movie Review - Now You See Me

Now You See Me (2013)

Starring Jesse Eisenberg, Mark Ruffalo, Woody Harrelson, Isla Fisher, Dave Franco, Mélanie Laurent, Common, Morgan Freeman, and Michael Caine

Directed by Louis Leterrier

I've always had a problem with Robin Hood stories.  Maybe it's the Republican in me shining through (a trait that I always have to suppress when it comes to the entertainment industry), but someone who robs the rich (simply because they have money) to give to the poor strikes me as an unspoken tenet of liberalism.  So perhaps in the deep recesses of my mind, Now You See Me -- a flick that revolves around a group of magicians who perform a series of heists to give money to their "deserving" audiences -- was destined to disappoint.  However, even if you take the repressed political aspect out of the equation, you're met with a film that had some modicum of potential except for the fact that it's saddled with a main plot that leaves too many gaping holes and an ending that feels like a cheat rather than magic.

I'm all for movies that have you root for the bad guys -- just look at my favorite movie of all time for proof of that.  However, when a movie presents a group of people as saintly good guys when they're absolutely doing things that are tremendously and justly illegal, I have a tough time buying into the premise as a whole.  If you set the quartet of magicians up as nasty guys, I'd have bought into the concept a little more willingly, but the characters portrayed by Jesse Eisenberg, Isla Fisher, Woody Harrelson, and Dave Franco are supposed to be good folks.  To me, good folks wouldn't be doing what this movie tasks these characters to do and this fundamental difference between what the movie wants me to believe and what I actually believe created quite a schism that it couldn't overcome.

That isn't to say that Now You See Me isn't slickly directed.  Louis Leterrier keeps the whole thing moving and it never lags for a second.  In addition, Jesse Eisenberg and Woody Harrelson in particular are certainly engaging.  (The less said about Isla Fisher and Dave Franco the better, and I'll avoid all discussions about Mark Ruffalo except to say that this actor whom I once liked has grown increasingly more obnoxious to watch over the recent years.)  Still, the positives aren't enough to overcome a final act that terribly disappoints.  I'm not quite sure the last time I've been so let down and upset by a third act twist that still has me aggravated a week after watching it.

While the first paragraph of this review was meant to be humorous, there is certainly truth in it in terms of my opinion about the overall concept of the film.  Your mileage may certainly vary when it comes to Now You See Me simply because it had to overcome an already self-imposed bias on my part to succeed.

The RyMickey Rating:  C-

Movie Review - Olympus Has Fallen

Olympus Has Fallen (2013)

Starring Gerard Butler, Aaron Eckhart, Morgan Freeman, Angela Bassett, Rick Yune, Dylan McDermott, Finley Jacobsen, Melissa Leo, Radha Mitchell, Robert Forster, and Ashley Judd

Directed by Antoine Fuqua

There's a feeling of "blah" that permeates throughout Olympus Has Fallen.  To me, "blah" doesn't necessarily mean bad, but it certainly doesn't connote anything good either.  There's a blandness here across the whole board from the acting to the story to the direction.  The screenwriters choose a topical enemy here as North Korean terrorists come into Washington, D.C., and wreak huge amounts of havoc on the city itself before honing in on the White House and taking the President (played by Aaron Eckhart), Vice President, and a few other important uppity-ups hostage.  With the terrorists having killed every Secret Service agent in the White House, the Commander in Chief's one chance at survival is Mike Banning (Gerard Butler), the President's former head Secret Service who quit his job after a horrible car accident eighteen months prior left the President's wife (Ashley Judd) dead.  Banning went to work at a different government position to distance himself from the shame he felt after being unable to save the First Lady, but when D.C. comes under attack, he springs into action, kills a bunch of the invading North Koreans and makes his way into the White House where he does his best to get the President and his close confidantes to safety.

Olympus Has Fallen only works when it keeps its focus on Gerard Butler.  Butler isn't given a whole lot to do, but when he's kicking ass and taking names, it's fun to watch.  It's not that Butler's Banning does anything particularly fresh, but he's got a charisma that at least makes things entertaining.  The rest of the film is unfortunately, as previously mentioned, generically bland.  Famous actors -- Morgan Freeman, Angela Bassett, Robert Forster, Ashley Judd -- appear for minutes and then fade into the background making us wonder how in the heck director Antoine Fuqua and the film's producers managed to snag them to appear in the film.

After watching this one, I'm kind of dreading the notion of watching this year's similarly themed White House Down...but now I kind of feel like I have to simply for comparisons sake.

The RyMickey Rating: C-

Movie Review - Oblivion

Oblivion (2013)

Starring Tom Cruise, Andrea Riseborough, Olga Kurylenko, Morgan Freeman, and Melissa Leo

Directed by Joseph Kosinski

I saw Oblivion on a whim on its last day of release in theaters and the only thing I really knew about it was that some article I read said that most audiences would find it too complicated to comprehend -- "You really have to pay attention," it stated.  I'm all for something deep and intricate, but I found myself bracing for something rough.  All I can say is that it'd be a shame if people read the same article as me and shied away from seeing this flick like I almost did because Oblivion is one of the best science fiction films I've seen in a long time.

In 2017, aliens known as the Scavengers destroyed Earth's moon which wreaked havoc on our atmosphere, causing earthquakes, tsunamis, and other weather-related disasters.  Seeing our weakness, the "Scavs" invaded Earth, and while we managed to defeat them it was only via nuclear warfare which left most of our planet inhabitable.  Sixty years have passed and the humans that survived the ordeal now find themselves living on Titan, one of Saturn's moons.  Their new colony is powered by giant energy stations that sit atop Earth's oceans and Jack Harper (Tom Cruise) and his partner Victoria "Vic" Olsen (Andrea Riseborough) live atop and run station #49, reporting back daily to Sally (Melissa Leo), their mission commander back on Titan.  One day, while Jack is out fixing a drone that protects the power stations from the few remaining Scavs on Earth, five pods fall from the sky containing humans including a woman named Julia (Olga Kurylenko) whom Jack has been seeing in his dreams -- a woman whose past may hold secrets that could change Jack's future.

Director Joseph Kosinski helmed Tron: Legacy three years ago and while I enjoyed that film, I felt that the action sequences weren't quite up to par, making me wonder if the then-first-time director had what it took to craft a special effects-heavy film.  Oblivion erases any questions in my mind about Kosinski's capabilities as he not only gets solid performances from all his actors and corrects any pacing issues I may have had with his prior work (this film moves along exceedingly well), but also creates a fantastic world here for the characters to inhabit.  Granted, considering that the film takes place only sixty years in the future, it is a little bit difficult to fathom the seemingly amazing advancements this plot believes that we as a civilization would have made (especially considering we would have been making said advancements in the midst of an alien invasion), but once you get past the notion that incredibly complicated hovercrafts and flying metallic autonomous drones are commonplace, Kosinski's Earth is a pretty nifty one.  All of the effects here are top notch and are really seamless -- they deserve to be remembered at year's end.

Tom Cruise has his ups and downs in my opinion, but for every Rock of Ages, there's a an action film like this one and I think this is the genre where he succeeds the most for me.  For a good portion of the film, it's just Cruise onscreen alone and he completely holds our attention.  Granted, the film isn't exactly asking for a lot from the guy, but he does a nice job.  Andrea Riseborough (whom I saw live on stage in a play in New York several years ago) is a presence I'd like to see in movies a bit more often.  This was her first big budget film and despite her character's cold exterior, she lit up the screen for me.  I thought there was something special about her when I saw her onstage and I think that's certainly the case.

The film's one disappointment is Olga Kurylenko whom I didn't love in Quantum of Solace and I wasn't a huge fan of here either.  It's not that Ms. Kurylenko does anything drastically wrong, it's just that I've yet to see her bring any modicum of enthusiasm or spark to her acting.  She's a pretty face, but she might have been better off sticking to her earlier modeling career.

Nevertheless, Oblivion surprised me for sure, providing me with one of the best science fiction moviegoing experiences I've had in a long time.  When this one eventually makes its way to Blu Ray, I highly suggest giving it a go.

The RyMickey Rating:  B+

Movie Review - The Dark Knight Rises

The Dark Knight Rises (2012)

Starring Christian Bale, Gary Oldman, Tom Hardy, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Anne Hathaway, Marion Cotillard, Matthew Modine, Morgan Freeman, and Michael Caine

Directed by Christopher Nolan

I've been avoiding reviewing The Dark Knight Rises for nearly a month now and the only reason I can think of is that after concluding this film there was just a sense of apathy that has only increased as time as passed.  It's not that this final chapter in Christopher Nolan's Batman trilogy is bad -- it's slightly better than the Batman Begins origin story, but not nearly as good as The Dark Knight -- but it's really just feels most genericly superhero-ey of the three flicks.

We've got our good guy Bruce Wayne (Christian Bale whose teeth-gritting toughness as his alter ego has worn out its welcome by this point) who has put Batman to rest after the masked vigilante took the blame for killing Harvey Dent in the prior film.  However, evil rears its ugly head again, this time in the form of Bane (Tom Hardy) who vows to fight the capitalistic rich pigs of Gotham by taking all of them down and suppressing the poor himself.  Throw in a petty thief named Selena Kyle (Anne Hathaway) who will later turn into the slinky Catwoman (although I'm not sure that name is ever uttered in the movie), a new love interest for Bruce in the form of Wayne Enterprises board member Miranda (Marion Cotillard), and a young cop named Blake (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) who tries to be the voice of reason to motivate Batman to come back to Gotham after Commissioner Gordon (Gary Oldman) almost resigns himself to the fact that the masked man won't return and the cast for this one is pretty much complete.

The problem is that despite the film's nearly three-hour runtime, the cast isn't given a whole lot to do. Bane as a villain is a disappointment especially coming after the one-two punch of Heath Ledger's Joker and Aaron Eckhart's Harvey Dent in the last film.  The motivation of taking down the upper class is fine (despite it sort of feeling like a retread of Ra's Al Ghul's evil plans in the first film), but the screenwriting duo of the Nolan brothers fail to make the story resonate even in these heightened economic times.

Gordon-Levitt and Hathaway were certainly welcome additions and it was nice that ample time was spent on their storylines since (as I mentioned above) Bale's incredibly one-note performance while in his Batsuit had worn out its welcome.  Unfortunately, Tom Hardy fails to really make an impression as Bane.  After the whimsically evil performance of Ledger's Joker, having Hardy behind a mask for the whole film and failing to see a single facial expression from our central villain is a bit of a letdown that isn't his fault in the slightest.

In the end, Nolan's Batman trilogy is solid, but it's not nearly as fantastic as fanboys and critics would have you believe.

The RyMickey Rating:  B-

Movie Review - The Dark Knight

The Dark Knight (2008)

Starring Christian Bale, Heath Ledger, Aaron Eckhart, Gary Oldman, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Michael Caine, Morgan Freeman, Eric Roberts, and Nestor Carbonell

Directed by Christopher Nolan

The two things I vividly remember about watching The Dark Knight in theaters four years ago was that the show I was seeing had a projector issue causing a "brain wrap" (in projectionist terms) which made the film stop (forcing me to head to another auditorium to watch the end) and that I thought Heath Ledger was perhaps a bit overrated in his role as The Joker.  At that point in time, I thought that Aaron Eckhart was the one who should be getting more praise for his take on Harvey Dent/Two Face and that Ledger's death was giving him some (slightly undeserved) great posthumous reviews.

Years later, I realize that perhaps I was a bit too harsh on Ledger.  Not that I ever thought his performance was bad, but I always felt that because of his death, he was being praised more highly than he would have had he been living.  While that may very well still be a true statement, the fact is that he did a heckuva job with The Joker.  Freakishly malevolent, there's an eerie psychotic presence whenever The Joker is onscreen.  

It's because of both The Joker's maniacal evilness and the stalwart Harvey Dent's shift into the flawed Two Face that make The Dark Knight an infinitely better movie than Batman Begins.  These two figures bring much more to the table in terms of conflict than anyone did in Christopher Nolan's first Batman film, but it's not just the "villains" that are wreaking havoc on Gotham City.  Batman himself is finding himself loved and hated by the city and Bruce Wayne is forced to come to terms with whether he is helpful or harmful to his fellow citizens.  Now that the origin tale has been told in the first film, Christopher Nolan is able to delve a bit more into the psyche of Bruce/Batman and it's a welcome addition.

Once again, supporting turns are all top notch.  Morgan Freeman, Michael Caine, and Gary Oldman all add an aire of professionalism to the film which often isn't felt in comic book adaptations.  Maggie Gyllenhaal takes on the role originated by Katie Holmes and fares a bit better.  Holmes was never bad (I feel like I'm one of the few people who actually liked her in Batman Begins), but Gyllenhaal felt a little less morose than the somber Holmes, although it's entirely possible that the role was just given a bit more life beyond "love interest" than in the first film.  Also, I find it invigorating that Nolan isn't afraid to create characters that are capable of dying.  Gotham City isn't a pristine town by any means and by having deaths occur to characters we come to know, Nolan creates a sense of urgency and fear that we don't normally feel in comic book adaptations which always seem to feature immortal characters.

The Dark Knight isn't perfect -- once again, Nolan drags the climax out for much too long -- but it's darn close to the best -- if not the best -- comic book flick I've ever seen.  Here's hoping The Dark Knight Rises finishes off the trilogy on a positive note.

The RyMickey Rating:  A-

Movie Review - Batman Begins

Batman Begins (2005)

Starring Christian Bale, Michael Caine, Katie Holmes, Gary Oldman, Cillian Murphy, Liam Neeson, Morgan Freeman, Ken Watanabe, Rutger Hauer, and Tom Wilkinson

Directed by Christopher Nolan

I must admit that I watched this back in mid-August.  I had planned on a one-two-three punch of Christopher Nolan's Batman trilogy, but that never came to fruition.  That said, with The Dark Knight Rises just arriving in the mail today, I figured I might as well briefly discuss my thoughts on this first flick in the series.

I didn't remember being a huge fan of this when it first came out in 2005 and this subsequent viewing in 2012 didn't really change my mind.  Origin tales always border on tedious for me and this proves no exception.  While I didn't mind learning the story of Bruce Wayne as a kid, once he gets older (and turns into Christian Bale) and travels to Asia to strengthen both his body and his mind, I lost interest.  As Bruce returns to Gotham, the film picks up a bit, but by the end, I found the climax to be much too lengthy.

It certainly doesn't help that Liam Neeson's Henri Ducard/Ra's al Ghul isn't a great villain, and while Cillian Murphy's Scarecrow is more menacing, I felt he wasn't exactly placed into the spotlight his character probably should have been.  Michael Caine, Morgan Freeman, and Gary Oldman are all quite strong in their roles providing nice characters for Bale's Bruce Wayne to play off of in their respective scenes together.  Katie Holmes is fine as well (although Maggie Gyllenhaal breathes a little more life into the same romantic love interest character in the second film).

As for Christian Bale, I'm not quite sure where I stand on him.  While I respect the choices of the deep voice and stoic emotionless demeanor while in the persona of Batman, it does make the character a bit one-note.  He certainly plays Wayne as a smart (though smarmy at times) playboy which allows for a bit more fun to be injected into things, but when behind the mask, he's almost bland.

While I'm mainly listing qualms with the film, I do think Batman Begins is a pretty solid comic book adaptation and certainly one of the better flicks of the genre over the past twenty years.

The RyMickey Rating:  B-

Movie Review - Red

Red (2010)

Starring Bruce Willis, Mary-Louise Parker, Morgan Freeman, John Malkovich, Helen Mirren, Karl Urban, and Richard Dreyfuss

Directed by Robert Schwentke

This is the movie that crapfest The Expendables wishes it could have been.  Fun, entertaining, full of explosions, and good acting (although even ho-hum acting would've been a step up from the empty visages of Sly Stallone and Dolph Lundgren), the "geriatric actioner" Red was a pleasant surprise that had me smiling from beginning to end.

Recently retired CIA agent Frank Moses (Bruce Willis) is in trouble.  For some reason or another, he has been targeted to be killed.  Narrowly escaping some home invaders, Frank flees and manages to reunite with some former (older) friends and fellow agents as they try and uncover who exactly is the mastermind behind the hit.

Now that the quick summary is out of the way, can I just mention how much fun it was to see Helen Mirren shooting machine guns?  There's an odd joy in the concept and director Robert Schwentke does a great job keeping a fun comic book-ish style going throughout the film (I'm not a comic guy at all, but now I kind of wanna read the book upon which this flick was based).  Perhaps because it's based on a graphic novel (or maybe in spite of it), Red has a hint of intelligence about it.  It's not just an idiotic shoot 'em up -- there's actually a purpose behind the kills.

Ultimately, though, what makes this movie work is the acting.  Across the board, you're looking at top-notch talent.  Bruce Willis is oddly charming and his relationship with Mary-Louise Parker provided surprising laughs.  Morgan Freeman and John Malkovich show comedic chops that I didn't think either actor had.  And Helen Mirren -- is it really wrong to think a 65-year old woman is sexy?  It's gotta be a British accent, I guess...I'll take Helen Mirren over Stallone any day.

The RyMickey Rating:  B+

Movie Review - Invictus (2009)

Invictus
Starring Morgan Freeman and Matt Damon
Directed by Clint Eastwood

Wow. I haven't been this bored in a movie in a while. In fact, very few movies in 2009 have bored me as much Invictus.

Morgan Freeman is utterly dry as Nelson Mandela who after being released from a South African prison in 1990 becomes President of the country in 1994. Amidst much racial tension, Mandela places what appears to be all his faith in bringing the country together behind South Africa's losing rugby team, the Springboks, and their quest to win the 1995 Rugby World Cup. Apparently, nothing else will unify whites and blacks except a rugby team. We are literally shown nothing else that Mandela does except put all his strength behind this team. Mandela is certainly an admirable figure, but he's portrayed here in the driest fashion possible. Granted, Mandela may not be the most jaunty guy...but maybe you shouldn't make a movie about him.

It's no secret that biopics are my least favorite genre (I've said it multiple times and will continue to do so) and Invictus does nothing to change that. Written by Anthony Peckham, we learn just enough about rugby to "kinda sorta" follow the matches on the field, but not nearly enough to understand what's really going on (Why are they in that massive huddle? Why was that a foul and why did it lead to the game-winning point?). And it's not just the rugby. This is 135 minutes of nothingness. Nothing happens here.

And part of that problem lies in Clint Eastwood's direction. Sure, I haven't seen a lot of Eastwood-directed flicks, but I've seen six or seven of them, and that's enough to prove to me that I dislike him immensely as a director. I've yet to see a film by him that's felt anything other than ploddingly paced. It's like watching a snail...no excitement whatsoever. There were shots here that felt so incredibly film school in their basicness and simplicity and with his sloth-like pacing issues, Eastwood needs to at least give me something visually stimulating. Plus, Clint hits us over the head here with the racial issues, going so far as to include some horrific song midway through telling me to be "Color Blind." I literally laughed out loud when that lyric invaded my eardrums.

I don't know of any rugby terms, so I'll stick with some a sports term that I know -- Invictus is yet another strike-out for Eastwood.

The RyMickey Rating: D