The Spy Who Dumped Me

The Spy Who Dumped Me (2018)

Starring Mila Kunis, Kate McKinnon, Justin Theroux, Sam Heughan, Hasan Minaj, Jane Curtain, Paul Reiser, and Gillian Anderson

Directed by Susanna Fogel

Written by Susanna Fogel and David Iserson
***This film is currently streaming via Hulu***

Click here for my Letterboxd review

The RyMickey Rating:  C

Movie Review - Bad Moms

Bad Moms (2016)

Starring Mila Kunis, Kristen Bell, Kathryn Hahn, Oona Laurence, Emjay Anthony, Annie Mumolo, Jay Hernandez, David Walton, Jada Pinkett Smith, and Christina Applegate

Directed by Jon Lucas and Scott Moore

I'm not a fan of Hangover-styled comedies where adults act raucous just because they usually can't in their normal lives so admittedly Bad Moms had an uphill battle to work for me, but with its essentially non-existent story, directors and co-writers Jon Lucas and Scott Moore have crafted one of the worst films of 2016.  Color me unsurprised upon looking at imdb.com that Lucas and Moore were the genius writers behind The Hangover and its sequels -- certainly shows that their quality of penmanship hasn't improved all that much in the past decade as they still mine for comedy in alcohol, drugs, and raunch but in the basest way possible.

The failure of Bad Moms has absolutely nothing to do with the women at its center -- a trio of moms who find their homelives in various states of disarray as their status as "Mom" has taken over all other aspects of their identity.  Mila Kunis, Kristen Bell, and Kathyrn Hahn are the reasons I stuck with this one for its entirety -- well, that and the fact that I watched it on a long car ride home from vacation and had nothing better to do.  Together, the trio are engaging and really do attempt to make the most out of a bad situation.

That bad situation, however, is simply unsaveable.  Sure, there are moments of levity -- many of them coming from Hahn's carefree, sex-crazed character -- but this film has almost no story to latch onto and its characters are so underdeveloped that it makes its 100-minute runtime feel interminable.  Were it not for the aforementioned cast -- which also includes Christina Applegate in a thankless and underdeveloped villainess role and Oona Laurence and Emjay Anthony as Kunis' kids -- there would've been no way I could've made it until the end.  Acting crazy doesn't always equal laughs as writers Lucas and Moore have more than proven looking at their resumés.  The public has spoken for some reason, though, and their style of pedestrian screenplay seemingly does the trick -- not for this reviewer, however.

The RyMickey Rating:  D-

Movie Review - Jupiter Ascending

Jupiter Ascending (2015)

Starring Channing Tatum, Mila Kunis, Sean Bean, and Eddie Redmayne

Directed by The Wachowskis

Essentially incomprehensible, Jupiter Ascending is an utter mess brought to us from the Wachowski siblings.  Lest you forget, I'm actually one of the few people who enjoyed Cloud Atlas, placing that unjustly reviled film in my Top Twenty of 2012, so I'm not inherently opposed to their crazy notions (although I was certainly not a fan of The Matrix).  Their latest incarnation is just a disaster.

Mila Kunis is Jupiter Jones, a Russian immigrant who came to the US as a baby and is now working with her mother as a maid for rich folks in Chicago.  About an hour into the film, we discover that Jupiter is the reincarnated mother of three alien siblings from some far away planet and one or more of them may want to kill her.  Prior to this discovery, Jupiter is seen attempting to be captured by a variety of different people despite the fact that we in the audience are clueless for sixty minutes as to why she's being hunted.  I literally found myself looking up things on Google like "Why is Jupiter Jones being chased" because the film sets up the story as if we should know what's going on and I found myself utterly clueless thanks to the piss-poor storytelling on display.

Ultimately, it's the script that's the biggest problem here with the Wachowski's failing to make sense most of the time.  Eddie Redmayne as one of those aforementioned bad siblings mumbles his lines, Channing Tatum rides around on gravity-defying boots acting tough (yet sensitive), and Mila Kunis unsuccessfully attempts to act surprised at everything going on around her.  The final hour of the film is one big action sequence that's just a bunch of noise and clanging and banging.  Ugh.  This one really is a worthless waste of your time.

The RyMickey Rating:  D-

Movie Review - Third Person

Third Person (2014)

Starring Liam Neeson, Mila Kunis, Adrien Brody, Olivia Wilde, James Franco, Moran Atias, Maria Bello, and Kim Basinger

Directed by Paul Haggis

I've always said I'm a fan of movies that attempt to interweave multiple storylines with an overarching theme.  Third Person is one such film, but it fails so miserably as it attempts to fill its bloated 135-minute runtime with three tales of loss that feel so poorly thematically connected that I couldn't help but wonder why Oscar-winning screenwriter-director Paul Haggis was ever given the green light in the first place.

One piece of the triad deals with Pulitzer Prize-winning writer Michael (Liam Neeson) who has secluded himself in a hotel room to finish penning his next masterpiece.  When his lover Anna (Olivia Wilde) surprises him, we realize that the relationship between these two lost souls is tenuous at best.  Then there's Julia (Mila Kunis), a mom whose son has been taken away from her by her ex-husband Rick (James Franco) after a horrible accident almost left their child for dead...or was not an accident at all?  Finally, Scott (Adrien Brody) is a sneaky businessman who steals upcoming suit designs from ritzy high-fashion designers in order to make cheap knock-offs.  While in a bar in Italy, he meets Monika (Moran Atias) who is struggling to find the money to pay off a gangster who has kidnapped her child...but is this all a con?

None of those stories really sound all that interesting on their own and when put together, they amount to a whole lot of depressing nothingness.   The male actors fare a bit better in the ensemble as most of the females are written so poorly that Kunis, Wilde, and Atias really couldn't do a thing to help forward their characters' plots or dimensionality.  Man or woman, though, I found myself completely removed from the variety of plights on display rather than being pulled in and invested.  Quite frankly, Third Person is a bit of a mess.

The RyMickey Rating:  D

Movie Review - The Angriest Man in Brooklyn

The Angriest Man in Brooklyn (2014)

Starring Robin Williams, Mila Kunis, Peter Dinklage, Melissa Leo, and Hamish Linklater

Directed by Phil Alden Robinson

***This film is currently streaming on Netflix***

I think The Angriest Man in Brooklyn is supposed to be a comedy and despite the fact that I didn't laugh once (or really even smirk in the slightest), I found one of Robin Williams' final films to be oddly endearing.  Admittedly, however, the reason for the emotion stems from the fact that Williams finds himself playing lawyer Henry Altmann, a man who discovers that a brain aneurysm has allotted him only ninety minutes left to live and he must determine whether he wants to continue on his current path of anger and resentment or reconcile his differences with his estranged wife and son (Melissa Leo and Hamish Linklater).  Had Williams not recently passed away, I doubt very much that the film would've had much impact.  However, true life seeps into the cinematic world a bit here, creating something a little more rousing than the film itself merits.

Williams is adequate as Henry, although I feel like we've seen him play this angry, somewhat crazed role before.  Yes, he dials things back a bit here, but not quite far enough if I'm being honest.  Mila Kunis plays his temporary doctor who has troubles of her own -- it should come as no surprise that her foibles will change for the better by crossing paths with Henry.  Together, Williams and Kunis play off each other surprisingly well, however many of their scenes together are so poorly written or so abysmally staged -- this film has one of the worst uses of green screen I've seen in a while -- that they end up falling flat.

The Angriest Man in Brooklyn is not a great film, but it is unfortunately made better simply because of the passing of Mr. Robin Williams whose real life struggles somewhat mirror the difficulties his character faces in this film.

The RyMickey Rating:  C

Movie Review - Oz: The Great and Powerful

Oz: The Great and Powerful (2013)
***viewed in 3D***

Starring James Franco, Mila Kunis, Michelle Williams, Rachel Weisz, and Zach Braff

Directed by Sam Raimi

There was no way Oz: The Great and Powerful was going to compare to the 1939 classic The Wizard of Oz, but I was surprised by what disappointed me the most about this prequel of sorts to that Judy Garland winner.  Rather than be wowed by the "astounding" visuals that can be created by filmmakers 75 years later, I instead found myself longing for the days when computer generated landscapes and backdrops didn't even exist yet.  When Garland's Dorothy lands in Oz, the flowers certainly have a plasticine look to them, but they look more "real" and visually appealing than much of what is seen in Sam Raimi's new take on author  L. Frank Baum's work.  The one lesson I learned from this new film is "just because we can utilize computers, doesn't mean we should."  That's not to say that Oz: The Great and Powerful is horrid.  Comparisons have been made to Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland and Oz fares better than that Johnny Depp-starring dreck.  But both films epitomize what is wrong with Disney's desire to "update" these classic films and stories for a new generation -- computer effects may seem to allow for more creativity, but the fact is that filmmakers decades ago had to be much more creative in a hands-on manner in order to get these fantastical lands like Oz and Wonderland to come to life.

Dorothy doesn't make an appearance in Oz: The Great and Powerful.  Instead, this is the tale of how the wizard -- podunk traveling circus magician Oscar Diggs (played by James Franco) -- got to the fantasy land in the first place.  Much like Dorothy, Oscar gets whisked up into a tornado, and when he arrives in Oz, he's greeted by Theodora (Mila Kunis), a lovely looking witch, who tells him about a recent prophecy that mentioned a man much like himself would come to Oz and, with his wizarding ways, right all that was wrong with the land.  Theodora takes Oscar to meet her sister, fellow witch Evanora (Rachel Weisz), in Emerald City where he discovers the abundant riches that the new wizard will inherit...should he manage to destroy the wand of the Wicked Witch who lives in the Dark Forest.  Along the way to destroy the Wicked Witch, Oscar meets Glinda (Michelle Williams), yet another witch, who tells Oscar that it is in fact Theodora and Evanora who are the evil ones in the land.  The question then becomes who exactly is Oscar to trust in this unfamiliar place?

Considering my rant in the opening paragraph of my review, it should come as a surprise that I think the best parts of the movie are the unique computer-animated characters brought to the screen in the forms of Finley (voiced by Zach Braff) -- a monkey who becomes forever indebted to Oscar after the wizard saves him from inevitable death -- and China Girl (voiced by Joey King) -- a tiny porcelain girl from Oz's China Town in which everyone is made of fine porcelain china.  While I disliked the computer generated landscapes the humans travel through in every single scene, I do appreciate the character work that has advanced with computer technology.  Finley and China Girl are able to do a bit more than, as an example, Toto in the original film.  Together, these two characters breathe life and impart much humor into the story...more than any of their human counterparts, that's for sure.

I used to be a fan of James Franco.  I say "used to" only because I can't help but think he just doesn't care about anything anymore.  Ever since his horrific hosting of the Oscars a few years ago, his attitude has been a complete turn-off to me and his nonchalance is carried to the screen in this obvious paycheck role for him.  His eyes are lifeless in nearly every scene and he lacks the whimsy needed for a character like the Wizard to succeed.  Similarly, Mila Kunis starts off painfully wooden.  As her character's secrets gradually are revealed, she's able to emote a bit more, but it's a rough start for her as well.  Things aren't much better for Michelle Williams either, but the role of Glinda is perhaps the trickiest one of the bunch, so I'm cutting her a little slack.  Glinda's the epitome of good (as we know from the 1939 original) and there's simply not much to work with.  Rachel Weisz certainly fares the best -- I just wish we didn't have to wait nearly an hour to see her character for the first time.

Despite the humans certainly disappointing, the film managed to hold my attention throughout and I can't ever really say I was bored and that's likely a credit to director Sam Raimi.  Raimi starts the film in a lovely black-and-white 4:3 Academy ratio when Oscar is in Kansas and then expands to a color widescreen format when in Oz.  While I thought this may be too much of an homage to the original, it's a device that still manages to work incredibly well -- it's oddly exciting when we get the first glimpse of color.  Raimi also realizes that despite Oz: The Great and Powerful being a family film, it's okay to throw in a few scary moments here and there...and there are a few moments involving those pesky flying monkeys that could easily frighten a young child.  Credit also must be given to some pretty nice 3D work on display.  It's not often that I'm able to comment positively on 3D work, so when I can, I like to point it out and mention that the upgrade may be worth the surcharge.

While Oz: The Great and Powerful may not have me clamoring for the inevitable sequel that will come our way in a few years, it certainly didn't taint the fond memories of its 1939 predecessor.  And it's a step in the right direction in terms of "fantasy remakes" after the heinousness of Alice in Wonderland a few years back.

The RyMickey Rating:  C

Movie Review - Ted

Ted (2012)

Starring Mark Wahlberg, Mila Kunis, Joel McHale, Giovanni Ribisi, and Seth MacFarlane

Directed by Seth MacFarlane

Thanks to a convenient wish on a star that came true, Josh Bennett has grown up with a real-live teddy bear as his best friend for over twenty years.  Josh (Mark Wahlberg) certainly hasn't kept the bear a secret, seeing as how Ted (voiced by Seth MacFarlane) made appearances on Johnny Carson's late night talk show decades ago, but both Josh and Ted's celebrity has faded as all flash in the pan news stories are wont to do.  Josh now works at a rental car dealership, and Ted stays home, smokes weed, has sex (somehow) with skanky women, and is pretty much that college buddy or coworker you know who has refused to grow up.  While Ted's an all around lovable guy, his rowdy ways don't sit well with Josh's longtime girlfriend Lori (Mila Kunis) who, finally fed up with Ted's shenanigans, gives Josh the ultimatum to either have Ted move out or lose her forever.

If only Ted had stopped there.  But, no.  Much like a meandering episode of Family Guy, writer-director Seth MacFarlane's live-action film debut throws a bit more at the audience -- a snobby love interest for Lori (Joel McHale) and a kidnapping plot involving an obsessed fan (Giovanni Ribisi) of Ted's which results in one of the most ridiculous (and utterly unfunny) climaxes this year -- and the goodwill that MacFarlane gains from a rather hilarious opening hour is tossed out the window.  It's rather unfortunate because I laughed out loud multiple times during the film's opening two acts, but I'm not sure I even cracked a hint of smile during the final forty minutes -- and in a comedy, that's a problem.

Nevertheless, Ted does have a lot of positives going for it.  For one, the Ted special effects are quite impressive and worthy of some commendation.  Secondly, I give MacFarlane credit for crafting half of a good film and while that sounds like damning praise, I mean that fully as a compliment.  I wasn't expecting much from him -- I like Family Guy, but can only take it in mild doses -- and he proved me wrong.  Lastly, Mark Wahlberg actually didn't suck here.  For the 2010 RyMickey Awards, I awarded Mr. Wahlberg the dubious honor of Worst Performance of the Year for his role in The Other Guys and said, "Wahlberg and comedy do not mix."  While his role here isn't over-the-top fantastic by any stretch of the imagination, he was certainly bearable (pun slightly intended).

The RyMickey Rating:  C+

Movie Review - Black Swan

Black Swan (2010)

Starring Natalie Portman, Mila Kunis, Vincent Cassel, Winona Ryder, and Barbara Hershey

Directed by Darren Aronofsky

I don't really know where to begin with Black Swan.  There are things like the direction and Natalie Portman's performance that I truly admired in Darren Aronofsky's character study of a tortured ballerina.  And then there's a script which, for the first two-thirds of the film, is riddled with clichés and painfully silly dialog that not even a talented director and actress can overcome.  While I do believe that Aronofsky is well aware of what I perceive as the script's problems (not that he would agree with that assessment) and attempts to play them to a full-tilt almost camp-like tone, the end product is flawed.

After struggling for a few years as part of a prestigious ballet troupe in New York City, Nina (Natalie Portman) finally seizes her chance to make a name for herself in her craft when the group's director, Thomas (Vincent Cassel) gives the young woman an opportunity to play the lead in his re-imagining of the classic ballet Swan Lake.  As the lead in the ballet, Nina must take on duel roles of both the white swan and black swan, with the former lending itself to the beautiful gracefulness that one typically associates with ballet and the latter adopting a more loose, aggressive, and powerful style.  Thomas is quite pleased with the softer side of Nina, but feels that her technique for the black swan is not nearly as gritty as he would like.  While he tries to prod Nina into exploring her inner self (which apparently only involves pleasuring oneself sexually), the young ballerina slowly begins to break down.  Feeling pressure from both her overbearing mother (Barbara Hershey) who treats Nina as if she were a little girl and Lilly, the sexy and talented newcomer to the group (Mila Kunis) whose wild, heavy-drinking ways are the complete opposite of the uptight and quiet Nina, Nina starts to go a little cuckoo (which is a completely different type of bird from a swan).

In and of itself, the story is fine.  The problem lies in both the dialog (which is so childish and stilted that there were moments I chuckled to myself) and the character of Nina who never really develops any characteristic other than "neurotic."  Even at the beginning of the film, Nina's timidity is too extreme to be normal and as the film progresses, she just gets increasingly more crazy.  Sure, the kookiness is a valid characteristic for the character, but there's nothing else there for Natalie Portman to latch onto as an actress despite the fact that multiple attempts are made to blatantly tell us that Nina is a fractured soul.  If she's so fractured, where are all these other elements besides "CRAZY" that make Nina who she is?

That said, Portman latches onto that craziness and gives the role her all.  Although, as evidenced by the previous paragraph, there's not nearly the depth that I thought was going to be present.  Portman is at her best in scenes where she's paired up with the lovely and sexy (and surprisingly talented) Mila Kunis and the frighteningly "Mommie Dearest-y" Barbara Hershey.  Both Kunis and Hershey are simply playing stereotypes to the hilt, but they embrace those clichés with gusto and make Portman's Nina an infinitely more interesting character.

As a director, Darren Aronofsky is certainly someone whom I admire.  Requiem for a Dream is one of the very few movies that I have given an 'A' to on this blog and it's a film that is probably in my Top 20 of All Time.  The Wrestler also was quite good and, similar to that film which was a tour de force character study for Mickey Rourke, Black Swan attempts to be a showcase for Portman.  Aronofsky certainly has talent -- there are scenes here that held me riveted...and then there was some insanely horrid dialog that ruined things.  But still, Aronsofsky has an eye for interesting visuals.  One scene that had me particularly entranced takes place in a night club and as the strobe lights begin to flash, Aronofsky simply pops up a completely different image with each flash of the strobes.  Portman...then Kunis...then the two together...et cetera.  That scene alone was sexier than any of the others in the film -- and this film certainly has a few sex scenes (although I'm sure a few will be very disappointed by the complete lack of nudity).

Anyway, I've rambled long enough and the more that I'm rambling, the more I'm actually disliking the film.  All that said, I do feel like this is a film I want to watch again without a doubt...and I honestly feel like the next time around, my thoughts could be completely different.  While I don't see this becoming the Best Film of 2010, I can see it rising up in the ratings.  Then again, I can also see it plummeting precipitously if I discover that it seems even emptier than I think it is now.  In the end, Black Swan is too many things and too few things at the same time.  It's a horror film, a psychological drama, and an intense character study...but it's also a character study with a complete lack of characteristics to be studying.  It's difficult to say that the film was one-note simply because I appreciate the direction of Aronofsky, but when you remove all the fluff around the edges of the story, there's really not nearly as much depth in the main character as the filmmakers would lead you to believe.  

The RyMickey Rating:  C+

Movie Review - Date Night

Date Night (2010)

Starring Steve Carell, Tina Fey, Mark Wahlberg, Taraji P. Henson, James Franco, Mila Kunis, Common, and Ray Liotta

Directed by Shawn Levy

Oh, Tina Fey.  I truly enjoy 30 Rock where you play the quick-witted Liz Lemon.  Your writing on that show is spot-on and makes me laugh out loud.

And Steve Carell.  While I haven't watched The Office on a regular basis, whenever I catch it in syndication, I find the whole thing incredibly amusing.  Your character Michael Scott creates a hilariously uncomfortable atmosphere that has put the series on my Netflix Instant Queue.

And yet, when the two of you comedians combine in the film Date Night, it's amazing how absolutely unfunny you both are.  When given an opportunity, you certainly can elicit laughs.  Just look at the scene where you both pretend to be strippers in a seedy club.  Who knew sexy robot dancing would make me crack up as much as I did?  But beyond the sexy robot, I hardly cracked a smile while watching this flick in which the two of you play a homely married couple from New Jersey who are mistaken for another couple on the run from some corrupt cops, local politicians, and mobsters.  While watching, I couldn't help but think of childhood film favorite with a similar plot -- Adventures in Babysitting -- and wishing I was watching that instead.

Granted, it's not really all your fault, Tina and Steve.  Director Shawn Levy (whose previous claim to fame are the godawful Night at the Museum films) doesn't exactly have a great eye for comedy.  Sometimes (as in the aforementioned strip club scene) he lets the two of you run wild to great effect.  However, at other times, he doesn't reel you in enough.  There seemed to be many moments where he let you run free which caused some scenes to go on for what felt like an eternity -- an eternity devoid of any laughter.

The plot is ridiculously convoluted, too, which I realize might have restrained you both from your full potential.  That being said, Tina and Steve, take my advice and stick to your day jobs.

The RyMickey Rating:  D

Movie Review - The Book of Eli

The Book of Eli (2010)

Starring Denzel Washington, Gary Oldman, and Mila Kunis

Directed by The Hughes Brothers

You don't get too many big budget Hollywood films about religion these days...and The Book of Eli is ALL about faith.  It may try and cover it up with gruesome killings, but in the end, it's all about religion and how it has the power to both inspire and corrupt.

We're several decades in the future and the Earth is in some type of an apocalyptic state.  There are hints of a great war, but it's also obvious that the environment (with a sun so bright you've got to wear shades to avoid blindness) has changed as well.  Eli (Denzel Washington) is a walker - a lone man who after hearing about a better land in the west longs to travel there.  With his faith in guide and his bible -- the only bible left on the planet -- he sets off on his journey.  

Along the way, Eli meets Carnegie (a scenery chewing Gary Oldman) who runs a small "Old West-type" town.  Carnegie's only goal is to find a bible -- for he feels that having this book will allow him to gain as many followers as possible to go about performing his will.  He's not a nice guy, and good man Eli knows this and must do whatever he can to keep the Bible out of Carnegie's possession.

The story's moderately successful, but it goes on for much too long.  About thirty minutes in, I couldn't believe that there was still ninety minutes to go.  It doesn't help that Oldman and Mila Kunis who plays (for all intents and purposes) his stepdaughter don't fare too well acting-wise here.  Oldman's Carnegie is nothing but a Old West villain stereotype and Kunis just isn't a very good actress (here's hoping Darren Aronofsky can bring something good out of her in his next flick).

Some people are fans of the 300-esque nearly constant green screen backdrops, but they annoy the hell out of me and the Hughes Brothers employ them quite a bit here.  While it's not incessant, it's unnecessary.  If I wanted a comic book feel, I'd read comic books.  Some of the fight scenes they shot were choreographed quite nicely, but they never once felt the least bit believable.  Maybe they weren't going for "real," but despite looking neat, they came off as silly.

Still, this isn't a bad film, it's just an average one.  Denzel is certainly good and a re-watch of his performance would probably lead to even more nuances that I didn't notice the first time around -- that's a hint at the moderately interesting "twist" to the film.  But on the other hand, the film's twist makes certain elements seem even more ridiculous and unbelievable then they already appeared.  

The RyMickey Rating:  C