The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause

The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause (2006) 

Starring Tim Allen, Elizabeth Mitchell, Judge Reinhold, Wendy Crewson, Ann-Margret, Eric Lloyd, Spencer Breslin, Liliana Mumy, Alan Arkin, and Martin Short

Directed by Michael Lembeck

Click here for my Letterboxd review

The RyMickey Rating:  D+

Movie Review - Inherent Vice

Inherent Vice (2014)

Starring Joaquin Phoenix, Josh Brolin, Katherine Waterston, Owen Wilson, Reese Witherspoon, Benicio Del Toro, Joanna Newsom, Jena Malone, Eric Roberts, Maya Rudolph, and Martin Short 

Directed by Paul Thomas Anderson

What in the hell was in the critics' water when they deemed Inherent Vice worthy of a 73% Fresh rating on Rotten Tomatoes?  Just because a film is directed by an esteemed director doesn't make it worthy of such a ranking.  Just because a film is well acted doesn't make it worthy of such a ranking.  Just because a film looks good and has better than average production values doesn't make it worthy of such a ranking.  A film still has to be enjoyable in a sense that the viewer must remain captivated by any of those aforementioned criteria mentioned or by its story.  Unfortunately, the directing, acting, and production values aren't enough to keep Inherent Vice afloat and, boy, is its story one of the worst and least captivating tales I've seen woven in a film in 2014.

There was talk of the story here being incoherent and frustrating, but I found the general gist of the plot fairly easy to comprehend.  A drug-addled private eye named Doc Sportello (Joaquin Phoenix) is drafted by his former lover Shasta Fay (Katherine Waterston) to determine the seriousness of Shasta's current lover's wife and her lover's desire to put her husband (and, remember, Shasta's current lover) into a loony bin and take all of his money.  It should be noted that if the previous sentence has thrown you for a loop, Inherent Vice probably isn't for you.  Then again, Inherent Vice really isn't for anyone.  The biggest issue with director and screenwriter Paul Thomas Anderson's flick is that it takes an already convoluted premise and branches off on so many tangents that admittedly are related, but fail to resonate or prove meaningful in the slightest.  Characters come in for single scenes, drop some other name for Doc to investigate, and then leave and never come back.  This pattern gets repetitive and old rather quickly and makes the nearly 150-minute run time feels like an eternity.

What saves Inherent Vice from the very bottom dregs of the RyMickey Rating system is that fact that the film looks good and contains acting that is certainly above average.  Unfortunately, I still found myself twiddling my thumbs, waiting for this never-ending story to conclude.  Unable to latch on to any of the film's characters or their plights, I found myself adrift here and completely unimpressed.

The RyMickey Rating:  D

Movie Review - Legends of Oz: Dorothy's Return

Legends of Oz: Dorothy's Return (2014)

Featuring the vocal talents of Lea Michele, Dan Aykroyd, Jim Belushi, Kelsey Grammer, Hugh Dancy, Megan Hilty, Oliver Platt, Patrick Stewart, Bernadette Peters, and Martin Short 

Directed by Will Finn and Daniel St. Pierre

***This film is currently strewing on Netflix***

$70 million was spent on Legends of Oz: Dorothy's Return -- an animated film that picks up right where the popular and iconic 1939 film ends.  Where that dough was spent, I don't know.

Was it spent on a voice cast picked straight out of a 1980s casting call?  Although I can't say anything bad about their work in the film, Dan Aykroyd as the Scarecrow, Jim Belushi as the Lion, Kelsey Grammer as the Tin Man, Oliver Platt as an owl, Bernadette Peters as Glinda the Good Witch, Martin Short as the "evil" Joker, and Patrick Stewart as a tree stump (you read that correctly) likely aren't raking in the dough.  Although rumors of her diva antics run rampant, I can't fathom that Lea Michele's agents were able to snag a boatload of cash for their client either despite the fact that Michele takes on the role of Dorothy.  While all of the voice cast does acceptable work, the money wasn't spent there.

Was it spent on the conglomeration of songwriters (including 90s staple Bryan Adams) who contribute a song or two to the plot?  If it was, that was certainly not money well spent as the songs are laughably disappointing.  Yes, Lea Michele's voice fits many of the ballads well, but the numbers lack emotion and sound much too similar to one another to merit distinction.

Was it spent on the animation?  I sure hope not.  The film looks little better than a cheaply made computer animated tv show.  Yes, some of the design elements are innovative in that they take the world of Oz (originally created by L. Frank Baum although this story [which is a retread of The Wizard of Oz but simply places new characters in the place of the Scarecrow, Tin Man, and Cowardly Lion] is based on the work of his grandson) and shine a light on its fantastical lands, but the characters themselves are wooden, static, and as bland as can be.

So where was that $70 million spent?  Certainly not on this film, right?  They inadvertently added a zero after that seven, right?

The RyMickey Rating:  D

Movie Review - Frankenweenie

Frankenweenie (2012)

Featuring the voice talents of Charlie Tahan, Catherine O'Hara, Martin Short, Martin Landau, Atticus Shaffer, and Winona Ryder 

Directed by Tim Burton

I had seen the original live action Frankenweenie short film years ago and remember thinking that it didn't have enough story to pad its thirty minute running time.  So, admittedly, I went into the new animated version a little reluctantly doubting that Tim Burton could make it work with even more time. Somehow, though, this black-and-white stop-motion animated flick fares a bit better than its predecessor likely thanks to an amusing climax full of homages to classic horror films like Godzilla, The Mummy, and The Creature from the Black Lagoon that ends the film on a positive note.

Borrowing heavily from Frankenstein for inspiration, Frankenweenie tells the tale of young Victor Frankenstein and his lovable pet dog Sparky.  Together, they're a great pair and the shy loner Victor finds great comfort in his pet.  Unfortunately, one afternoon a horrible tragedy befalls Sparky as he has an untimely meeting with the front bumper of a car.  Depressed, Victor wallows through his everyday life until one day during science class, his new teacher Mr. Rzykruski (Martin Landau) displays that despite the fact that living things die, their muscles and nerves can still react to electric stimulus.  With the school science fair on the horizon, Victor sets out to reanimate his beloved Sparky.

Unlike this year's previous stop-motion entries -- Paranorman and The Pirates! Band of Misfits -- Frankenweenie's animation is charmingly more herky-jerky in nature.  Whereas the aforementioned films had a fluidity that had me wondering if I was watching a computer-animated version of stop motion, Tim Burton's film was lovingly "old school" and it worked to great effect considering this is Burton's homage to classic horror films.  Both styles prove that stop-motion animation is still a wonderful format...it's simply unfortunate that the general public doesn't seem to feel that way as none of the three films proved to be overly successful at the box office.

With some nice vocal turns from Catherine O'Hara, Martin Short, and Martin Landau and a beautiful black-and-white landscape to feast upon, I'd love to say that Frankenweenie is completely successful.  Unfortunately, this animated film falls into the same trap as the short that preceded it -- there's just not enough story here.  Granted, the animated film does adequately fluff out the basic story and while it is more successful in that department than the short, it still doesn't quite achieve success.  For a film with a eighty-minute runtime, I shouldn't find myself staring frequently at a watch.

The RyMickey Rating:  B-