Movie Review - Ted

Ted (2012)

Starring Mark Wahlberg, Mila Kunis, Joel McHale, Giovanni Ribisi, and Seth MacFarlane

Directed by Seth MacFarlane

Thanks to a convenient wish on a star that came true, Josh Bennett has grown up with a real-live teddy bear as his best friend for over twenty years.  Josh (Mark Wahlberg) certainly hasn't kept the bear a secret, seeing as how Ted (voiced by Seth MacFarlane) made appearances on Johnny Carson's late night talk show decades ago, but both Josh and Ted's celebrity has faded as all flash in the pan news stories are wont to do.  Josh now works at a rental car dealership, and Ted stays home, smokes weed, has sex (somehow) with skanky women, and is pretty much that college buddy or coworker you know who has refused to grow up.  While Ted's an all around lovable guy, his rowdy ways don't sit well with Josh's longtime girlfriend Lori (Mila Kunis) who, finally fed up with Ted's shenanigans, gives Josh the ultimatum to either have Ted move out or lose her forever.

If only Ted had stopped there.  But, no.  Much like a meandering episode of Family Guy, writer-director Seth MacFarlane's live-action film debut throws a bit more at the audience -- a snobby love interest for Lori (Joel McHale) and a kidnapping plot involving an obsessed fan (Giovanni Ribisi) of Ted's which results in one of the most ridiculous (and utterly unfunny) climaxes this year -- and the goodwill that MacFarlane gains from a rather hilarious opening hour is tossed out the window.  It's rather unfortunate because I laughed out loud multiple times during the film's opening two acts, but I'm not sure I even cracked a hint of smile during the final forty minutes -- and in a comedy, that's a problem.

Nevertheless, Ted does have a lot of positives going for it.  For one, the Ted special effects are quite impressive and worthy of some commendation.  Secondly, I give MacFarlane credit for crafting half of a good film and while that sounds like damning praise, I mean that fully as a compliment.  I wasn't expecting much from him -- I like Family Guy, but can only take it in mild doses -- and he proved me wrong.  Lastly, Mark Wahlberg actually didn't suck here.  For the 2010 RyMickey Awards, I awarded Mr. Wahlberg the dubious honor of Worst Performance of the Year for his role in The Other Guys and said, "Wahlberg and comedy do not mix."  While his role here isn't over-the-top fantastic by any stretch of the imagination, he was certainly bearable (pun slightly intended).

The RyMickey Rating:  C+